The Adventures of Kate F. A.

New

2012-01-09T13:00:00.000+08:00

New year: 2012
New status: married
New occupation: housewife (and still a struggling student)
New surname: Abad
:)

The Chickenpox Adventure

2011-11-10T22:09:00.001+08:00

Day 0 (Saturday) - fever

I even had a trial make up, so good luck to them :P

Day 1 (Sunday), morning - high fever and a few "pimples" on my back

I even had Lara check my back to see the pimples and counted them as four. As the day progressed, I realized I had a few more "pimples" on my head and neck and legs, and wondered what weird illness struck me this time.

Day 1 (Sunday) afternoon - still with fever and the "pimples" are really weird

I asked Tita Star to check my back since I already doubted the rashes were pimples. She said it might be chickenpox (bulutong tubig). Scared. The internet scared me more, with all the write ups about adult chickenpox being more difficult and potentially leads to complications. We went to the doctor, but the doctor's not around.

Day 2 (Monday) - check up

Still with fever, but less paracetamol intake. The doctor gave me acycrovil and anti-histamine for this ordeal. Very uncomfortable, especially with a high fever. I had to send an e-mail for work, after which my fever went up. So really no work until I've fully recovered.

Day 3 (Tuesday) - panic, still uncomfortable

I've scratched a couple of rashes last Sunday on my neck, and by this time those two look bad. So I went again to see the doctor, but the doctor wasn't there, but the assistant said "that's the real chickenpox." Oh well.

Day 4 (Wednesday) - really bored, a bit better, but still very uncomfortable

Time is really slow when you have nothing to do. The rashes are all itchy and yucky. The medicine helped contain the virus as there were only a few rashes on my body (not as few as I want them to be, but that only few are visible to me.) No paracetamol intake for the day. Oh, check up with the doctor again and she gave me antibiotics to prevent infection. Some rashes are about to burst (and so eeecky, whatever that means.) Rashes on my head gave me a difficult time to lie in bed, but I still had a good sleep.

Day 5 (Thursday) - really bored, feeling better, itchier, looks yuck

Due to boredom, I'm tempted to work...not! I was really tempted to work especially since my workmate got loads of work due to my absence. But I know I'll get tired if I work and might get a fever again, so no, I'll take a rest.

I take off my glasses when I go to the bathroom so I won't see my face clearly. The rashes on my face are just so big and look really ugly (they're about to burst, I guess.) I try not to look at my other rashes. Good thing most are concentrated on my back, and only a few on my arms and legs. Bad thing that the order of concentration is back-neck/head/face-tummy-legs-arms. I have to go the dermatologist after I've recovered (and harmless, wrt the virus, to other people) - I'm getting married in about six weeks (bad timing, chickenpox, but better than have it on December!)

Day 6 - tomorrow

A short rant

2011-08-08T23:55:00.000+08:00

What should I do now, career-wise?

I'm done with MA. I should be starting my dissertation. I should already be writing the health paper. I am employed as an RA, but I'm bored and I'm not learning. I am excited to start a new chapter of my life soon.

Yet, really, what should I do with my career?

My birthday wishlist for my 27th birthday

2011-06-25T20:52:00.000+08:00

Sa sobrang stressed sa compre exam at sobrang pagre-relax sa bakasyon, nakalimutan ko ang aking birthday wishlist. Unti lang naman ang nagbago (kung meron man) mula sa mga nakaraang taon:

bagong mga damit
~~sapatos~~
~~bag na pambabae~~
iPad (yung 2)

At sa mas makabuluhang wishlist (binisita ko muna ang wishlist ko noong nakaraang taon bago ko ito naisip):

dissertation topic
magandang kalusugan
kasiyahan at pagmamahalan magpakailanman

*updated on Nov. 10, 2011

Ano ang gagawin ko pagkatapos ng compre exam?

2011-05-02T19:48:00.000+08:00

Ito ang balak kong gawin pagkatapos ng compre exam, plano ko sa buhay, hindi yung listahan ng mga gagawin depende kung pass o fail:

Mag-TF dahil required at dahil gusto ko [pass or fail]
Part time RA siguro [pass or fail]
Pumunta doon sa kabilang bansa [pass or fail]
Gumawa ng paper para sa health [pass or fail]
Mag-isip ng dissertation topic [pass]
Aralin muli ang macro at micro theories, paunti-unti [fail]

Ang maiiba lang naman ay yung sa item 5 at item 6. Dahil magtuturo ako sa darating na sem, mas kaya naman siguro yung item 6 kung sakaling fail.

Pagod na akong mag-aral. Gusto ko na magbakasyon.

To Do List

2011-05-01T00:15:00.004+08:00

My last entry was a "to do list" on October 2, 2010, some seven months ago! Blame the PhD program for my absence in this virtual world! (Am I even fit for that program?!)

Here's a list* of the things I want (and need) to do after the comprehensive exam on May 10 and 12:

Shop for new wardrobe (I need a sponsor for this =P)
~~Go to the beach worry-free!~~ *5/15/11
~~Spa!~~ *5/29/11 fish spa =P
~~Some travel with you~~ *5/20/11-06/12/11
Reconnect with friends (kain at tambay)
Clean the house/room
~~Drive the car back to Zambales (invitation to join me is open)~~ *5/14/11
~~Movies and series marathon (list includes BBT =D )~~ *vacation
Haircut, hair spa, manicure, pedicure, kaartehan lang

**subject to revision

To Do List

2010-10-02T23:19:00.003+08:00

Here I go again with a "to do list" - my guiding list to achieve a more worthwhile life. It sometimes really helps me straighten my path, especially if posted here.

Take my 7:30 or 8:00 AM alarm seriously
Listen to my whole being if I needed to stop and take a break
Focus on things I have to do and believe that I can do them
Eat a lot
Try to sleep not later than 1:00 AM

I dare myself to follow this list. If I could follow this until at least the semester officially ends, I wish to reward myself with the 50mm f/1.8 lens (and only if I could find funds for that thing, or at least I wouldn't feel guilty if I'd splurge on it). The dare starts now!

Positive Vibes and Attitude

2010-10-02T00:04:00.003+08:00

I thought I would get the chance to go home only when the semester finally ends. However, I've realized I needed to go home to rejuvenate my battered self and get strength from my family.

The past few weeks have been so stressful and frustrating on my part. This semester is supposedly easier compared to my first semester last year (due to the absence of a unreasonably demanding professor). However, this semester has so far been the most stressful one.

I attribute the overwhelming level of stress from lack of emotional maturity to face this "upgraded" academic and intellectual task. I sometimes even think I just got lucky to get invited to the PhD track. I have even felt that I shouldn't be here.

Yet I am here. I got invited. While I am struggling to succeed, I should realize that I wouldn't be here without a good reason. I guess I simply have to be more confident, have more courage, believe and have faith.

Getting some much-needed break with the love of my family at home is simply great. Especially after reading a couple of my previous blog posts, my mindset on life lightened and my frustration and disappointment turned to challenges in a positive sense.

I intend to survive this course. I will give my best and strive for excellence, but I shall not forget about my whole well-being, including my health and the simple pleasures of life. I greet the new day with a smile, armed with positive vibes and attitude. :)

On studies and stress and impatience and disappointment

2010-10-01T23:02:00.001+08:00

Weeks before my third semester in graduate school ends, I am deeply suffering from stress, disappointment and high level of impatience.

Stress comes naturally, I think, or at least not unexpectedly given the demands of school - papers, exams, presentation, and aiming a decent grade. What make me more uneasy now, and a big reason for my stress, are disappointment and a rather high level of impatience. I first discuss disappointment.

Last year I made a big leap when I applied for the master’s program in economics. Getting an MA degree in economics has really been a part of my dream after college graduation, something I’ve realized during my first work when I knew I wanted to teach. Lack of self-esteem, lack of guts, lack of a focused vision were just some of the reasons for my hesitation.

So finally last year was the big leap, a decision I consider as one of the greatest I’ve made. I prepared myself, expecting and hoping to graduate within two years.

Then this summer, I got invited to the PhD program. What a nice surprise, but confusion ensued. Hesitation surfaced again. I was afraid I could not survive it. It was almost in conflict with my more personal life. I was afraid, and afraid.

Yet in the end, the adventurous me prevailed. Besides, I got invited so the faculty might really be thinking I could survive another year of coursework for the PhD program, and the comprehensive exam, and the dissertation. I am now in my first semester for the coursework.

So here comes the disappointment. I feel like I am not performing well. I feel like a below average student. I feel like an unworthy PhD student. Heck, I could probably do some optimal control problem, but those topics I consider as more interesting and more valuable are the things I find more difficult.

Even more, I suck at writing papers. I suck at presenting. I suck at communicating. I suck at organizing my thoughts. (Sucker, and I don’t want to be a sucker. Who wants to, anyway?) I think I am failing at these things, which are critical as a PhD student, as a prospective researcher, as someone (hopefully) coming from the academe, as someone making a career outside the academe, and probably more. So what do I do? What can I do!

(This tumblelog is actually an attempt to make myself write more, to practice writing with a more coherent thought, to read more, to be more aware of the things around me, to be not just reactive but react on issues with sense and intelligence, and even more proactive.)

So that’s where my disappointment is coming from. I could not live up to my expectation of a worthy PhD student (and later as a worthy PhD candidate).

Now I discuss my rather high level of impatience.

Getting in the PhD track was not a part of my original plan. Just for the MA program, I have already hesitated for around four years before finally enrolling. That even included some prodding and encouragement from the great people I’ve worked with in the past few years. The decision to get myself into the longer PhD track was a relatively impulsive one.

That impulsive decision is now reflected in my high level of impatience - impatient to finish this coursework the soonest, impatient to do other things aside from studying, impatient to pursue my more personal plans. Simply impatient.

I have not been emotionally and mentally prepared to subject myself to a longer agony. Graduate school is more than just being intellectually prepared and able. It also requires mental and emotional preparedness as it usually involves (especially in my case as full time, fully loaded with 12 units, graduate student) some degree of removal from one’s social and family circle.

I miss my family. I miss my love. I miss having a worry-free weekend.

I hope and I pray I can survive and succeed in this endeavor. I want it, really, even if the decision to endure prolonged agony was a somewhat impulsive one. Even with the pain and sleepless nights, I want what I am pursuing now. Help me God.

original post

At 26

2010-06-19T11:52:00.004+08:00

Days after turning 26, I have embarked on an unintended and unplanned "life reflection" (or whatever it may be called).

And that reflection came unexpectedly. I was pretty comfortable with my life, then stress from grad school hit me.

I was just browsing through my blogs when I saw and realized that my last entry was a birthday wishlist. So here's a look on what I've got and still trying to achieve.

that 50mm f/1.8 lens

Not practical to buy for myself, and not expecting anyone to give it to me anytime soon; unless stress hit me big time that I need a regular form of release of wasteful energy (in the form of a camera and smaller lens, which is less costly than a brand new compact P&S camera)

books (fiction/fantasy, non-fiction that are fun to read)

Pinay gave me a book, and I love it! Thanks so much! :)

good health (and funds for check-up)

I'm working on this one (check up, funds) and praying that God will give me better health.

writing skills (for those papers)

Still hoping...

wisdom (patience, endurance, and ability to survive grad school and beyond)

Praying on it... And still working on it... That's why I'm here writing again.

tickets (to travel)

Thanks thanks thanks for the tickets! I just forgot to tell my Dad that I'll be using my passport again a few months from now... :P

Two years ago, I was surprised to realize that I was already 24, on the mid-20's range. Last year, I was excited on my new adventure: graduate school and a clearer path to my dream. This year, I've realized I am already on the higher half of the 20's range. I have been feeling good about my life and direction until the stress of this new program hit me. What have I gotten myself into? Am I lacking in emotional maturity to face this new (or just upsized) adventure?

Maybe God just wants me to reassess my life, and be more thankful and appreciative of my life. I am thankful. Yet, I pause for a bit, gather some strength, faith and courage, renew my focus, prepare for some jolt in the ride, and LIVE.

Wishlist for my 26th birthday (what, 26?!)

2010-06-01T10:14:00.000+08:00

Welcome, June 2010! In a few days, I'm turning 26! Woohoo! Ganun kabilis? Akala ko 21 pa rin ako, turning 22. =P

To keep up with "my tradition", here's my official wishlist for my birthday (I posted somewhere a wish I made a few weeks ago, which will be included here).

that 50mm f/1.8 lens
books (fiction/fantasy, non-fiction that are fun to read)
good health (and funds for check-up)
writing skills (for those papers)
wisdom (patience, endurance, and ability to survive grad school and beyond)
tickets (to travel)

Really, not much material things. But if I were to include more of them, I write:

comfortable, flat (girly) shoes
new wardrobe (I haven't been able to really shop for years now due to lack of funds)
cellphone with wi-fi, pdf reader, camera, mp3 player, and long-lasting battery

Have a happy life! ^_^

A not so random thought, evening of May 26, 2010

2010-05-26T23:25:00.001+08:00

A year has passed. Another year to go and more.

Less than two months have passed. Less than two weeks to go.

Four months have passed. How many more months to go?

Eleksyon 2010

2010-05-10T17:00:00.001+08:00

The Philippines' first automated election experience

Musts:

wear a sunblock
wear light clothing
bring a fan
bring a portable chair (that is, something easy to carry around)
bring an umbrella
bring water
bring food (snacks, lunch, or even dinner if you wish)
bring a book or some other form of entertainment
for prepaid subscribers, ensure that you have load (for entertainment and to call for reinforcement [food, water, etc.])
prepare your election cheat sheet
wet wipes (for the sensitive ones)
lots of patience (as Karen put it, low rho is needed)

Kate and the MA Program (Some Reflection)

2010-05-07T16:32:00.001+08:00

Around this time last year, I was on vacation but occasionally thinking about the "test" I had to take after the refresher course in preparation for the graduate program in economics. That was the highlight vacation last year, but not the highlight "event" of my year (although it comes very very close to being the highlight of the year).

Now, I do not have (yet) the "highlight vacation of the year" since I could not afford a big one this time. The graduate program has temporarily deprived me of real income, and hence the ability to save up for vacations (and gadgets!). Yet, that deprivation has been negligible given the awesome year (school year, to be more correct) that I had.

For the past year, I've done things I haven't imagined I could do. It felt good. Even if at the same time, it made me know less about economics (the more I study it, the less I know about it), and still managed to hate writing papers. At least, it made me learn more about life.

It surprised me to find that I could have the character to survive my first year in graduate school. It instilled a lot of discipline in stubborn me. Of course I exude some aura of goody-goody nice girl, but really I can be as hard-headed as I want (well, at least in my standard of being good).

I am aware that I had (and still having) trouble in time management and sorting out my priorities (high priority goes to living it easy). I'm not fond of doing hard work, I sleep late and get up late, I am lazy, and I procrastinate.

After a year in the graduate program, I am proud to say that I have improved. I have done the hard work (at least, if that means doing a weekly problem set in statistics, doing seatwork for 11 hours, having an exam that is not graded point by point [be as rigorous as you can], answering a take-home exam that is more like a research paper, starting early doing a paper [but sadly, ended up cramming it again], trying to understand a proof that appears to be of no use to me except for exams, taking up economic history without knowing my history, answering an exam that appears like the compilation of the seatworks for the whole second half of the semester, spending precious money to study outside the comfort of my room and avoid the temptation to sleep, making the library my second home, making Starbucks my another second home, treating my home as a boarding house, missing my little sisters, drinking tons of cups of coffee [I prefer milk or tea or chocolate], and the list goes on).

Oh, I have even managed to put myself in danger. I've witnessed a PDEA operation, with big guns and dirty words being shouted. I've also walked past a street where just minutes earlier, a man shot another man. I've also managed to ride a cab whose driver appeared like a crazy man with bloodshot eyes (according to Pinay) and treated the streets of Quezon City like a racing track.

And who would have thought that after a year in that School, I would wake up at 8:30 in the morning most of the time during summer break? Me, who people knew was so fond of sleeping they could casually greet me "good morning" at one in the afternoon, gets up early (of course, early for me is before 9:00 AM).

I think I still am lazy and I still procrastinate, but I'm getting out of my way to straighten my path. I've searched ways to push me do the little tasks on time, I've been more goal-oriented than before, and more forward-looking. Although for this one, the process has started back to the time when I finally decided to earn my MA degree.

More than all those self-improvement, my life became more colorful with the bright minds and the wonderful friends I've met. For that, I am very grateful.

Looking back, my first year was not stellar to make me an expert in economics, but it certainly made me live my life better (save for the unhealthy sleeping habit I had especially during the second semester). LIFE-ENRICHING. I like that word.

So what now? What would be the highlight this year? What "life-enriching" thing will I do?

;)

From my diary, Volume 6: "Quotable Quotes"

2010-02-28T01:32:00.001+08:00

July 6, 1999: "P.S. Patay na si Eugene sa Ghost Fighter."

July 20, 1999: "Kung kausapin kita, sa bulletin board lang, akala mo lalamunin kita."

August 12, 1999: "Sa recollection, ang katabi ko sa left ay si Jericho. Sa right, Reymond. Dalawang guwapo!" (Note: Hindi ko sila crush ng mga panahong ito, lalo na yung pangalawang pangalan.)

August 19, 1999: "...basta ang sabi niya, baka raw ma-karma siya dahil ang galing niyang manukso." (Si Reymond ito.)

August 19, 1999: "...I'm just trying to be friendly."

September 19, 1999: "Nakita ko silang lahat." (Mga crush ko, anim sila.)

September 25, 1999: "Nanood kami ng volleyball boys at sepak takraw. Ang cute ni _____! Ang cute ni _____! Ang galing!"

Trip!

2010-02-22T17:09:00.001+08:00

I miss travelling!

Early in the morning, I'm here at Starbucks (Matalino) for some nice and heavy cramming for econometrics exam. Beside our table is a group of Korean people talking about something I cannot understand for they are speaking in their language. Now, it made me miss and want to travel to foreign land!

Practically no other visible group is present here, so hearing them made me remember about that Vietnam trip. Quite a memorable one, my first trip abroad alone (though with someone waiting for me in that foreign land). Most of the time there, I was alone, walking around alone, and a few encounters with the locals.

It was a nice feeling - that kind of a welcome feeling. Enriching, even if I could have done more. Interestingly, my graduate school experience has not only given me a better understanding of economics, but also an appreciation of history, culture and the idiosyncrasies of a people. I want to experience another foreign trip with that kind of enrichment.

I wish to travel soon, here or abroad, and I wish to have that money to finance this pleasure *wink*. I miss travelling and going out!

*Now, back to regular programming. I give myself back to Jeffrey M. W.*

Tumblr

2010-02-08T12:17:00.001+08:00

Ooops! Just got addicted with Tumblr.

Cool lay-outs. Way better than Blogger or Wordpress. I love it especially for photos. Aack! It sure can distract me from school.

I was just browsing browsing the other day for non-stuff out of sheer laziness. After tumbling upon tons of quotations in graphics from Tumblr, I wondered how the heck it worked. So up I joined.

Two days later, I still can't get enough of it. I love its layouts! Since I don't have something right now to work on to relieve stress, I browsed through 2009 photos, chose a few that I liked, edited some, then posted them. Voila! A preview of my 2009, a collection of the shots that I liked (and which I think were the best). Check it out here: http://katefarrales2009.tumblr.com.

Originally, I thought that since my blog in Blogger looks cluttered (at least for my standard), I decided to make my Tumblr blog the blog for photos (sort of the photoblog choice of the moment). The 2009 preview was a decision after seeing (and realizing) that "my 2009 best" cannot be highlighted with my ordinary regular mediocre shots of my day-to-day (at least will try to make it daily, but I doubt I could make that) life. So here's the link: http://katefarrales.tumblr.com.

I'll still keep this blog, and the other one. This for the random rants, while the other for trip/travel/adventure features. Speaking of the latter, I hope to add to that one soon. I miss going on trips!

So, I still have an exam tomorrow, and I need to study. I've splurged my whole weekend on non-school-related stuff already, plus half of this Monday. Good luck!

(P.S. I still need to drop by a Meralco branch since I forgot to pay the bill, and its due two days already! Tsk tsk.)

Now that you're in Singapore

2010-01-21T00:45:00.001+08:00

"Even if I haven't spent enough quality time with you, even if you may feel neglected at times, and even if our memories together have been quite few, you're still a big part of my life. Since yesterday, I've been missing you. I hope I have given more time for you, made more memories to cherish forever."

Oh yeah, that's for my camera. Mon brought it to Singapore, who flew there just this afternoon. I don't know when he'll be back (and ultimately, when I'll be reunited with my dear cam). Or I should go get it there myself if he doesn't come home soon. He should, however, shoulder my plane ride as I am currently living in poverty.

Apparently, it's true - you only get to value someone (or something) when it's gone. Fortunately, it's not going to be a permanent (or even long) separation.

Anyway, this semester has been quite slow... The readings and stuff needed to be done have been piling up very slowly, but now it has become very big. Scary. (And yet, here I am writing on this thing.) It still feels slow, though. And boring.

Bored, even with tons of stuff to do or readings to read. (I think I prefer problems that can be solved mathematically than read historical analyses of what happened or whatever.) That boredom made me want to re-ignite my love affair with a camera - particularly, start an amazing affair with my dear cam (I really have not made it a habit to name my gadgets, and even if I do, I probably would have given them boring names).

To prep me up, I've been reading some articles from DPS - just enough to get me excited. Now that dear cam's in SG, the momentum might swing away. Yet, I hope not.

So what other "creative" outlet to turn to? Put some sizzle to life!

12 Little Things Every Filipino Can Do to Help Our Country

2009-12-28T17:41:00.001+08:00

I got this from an e-mail, which the sender found from her "favorite book at home written by an old friend" who "thought it over long trips visiting underprivileged clients."

From The 12 Little Things Every Filipino Can Do to Help Our Country by Alex "Pinoy" Lacson

1. Follow traffic rules. Follow the law.

I do follow traffic rules.

2. Whenever you buy or pay for anything, always ask for an official receipt.

I do it except in sari-sari stores, or when I'm just tired and oblivious to the world.

3. Don't buy smuggled goods. Buy local. Buy Filipino.

I don't buy smuggled as far as I know. Yet, I have some pirated programs in my laptop (I think three) and tons of pirated e-books and music or movies. I love Filipino products, but let's not start talking about comparative advantage...

4. When you talk to others, especially foreigners, speak positively about us and our country.

Yes I do! Except that election in our country is so not ideal...

5. Respect your traffic officer, policeman and soldier.

Yes, sir! I just hope they are respectable, too.

6. Do not litter. Dispose your garbage properly. Segregate. Recycle. Conserve.

Of course.

7. Support your church.

How?

8. During elections, do your solemn duty.

I vote and I will vote.

9. Pay your employees well.

Employees?

10. Pay your taxes.

Uh-oh.

11. Adopt a scholar or a poor child.

I am student myself who needs financial assistance, too.

12. Be a good parent. Teach your kids to follow the law and love our country.

Oh, not yet a parent.

How will I fare next year?

Imagine

2009-12-27T11:41:00.001+08:00

Could I just be imagining things?

I just saw last night a large flying insect that at first glance looked like a mosquito, and somewhat a spider when it was on the wall. When I saw it flying again, it looked like a giant mosquito.

I was reading some journal article when it flew past in front of me, through the study lamp, then behind the study table. I was shocked. Then I checked it behind the table to make sure that it was real, and it was there! I freaked out. I did not know what kind of insect it was. I was afraid to smack it with a bunch of papers.

So I went to get some insecticide, then sprayed it on the strange insect. Then it flew again, and again I freaked out. Then it flew again, and again I sprayed some insecticide until it was gone. I didn't know where it went, probably died, or hid, or disappeared from my imagination.

Later learning that I shouldn't have had sprayed the poisonous chemical in my room when the aircon was turned on and my little sister was asleep, I sprayed some freshener and left the door open. While waiting for the smell to go away, I comforted myself by hiding from my blanket, wishing the strange giant insect would not appear anymore (or grow bigger).

It wasn't really giant. Just the size of a gagambang bahay (the spider with thin long legs), but flying.

Did I just encounter a common insect I don't know and haven't seen until now that I'm 25? Maybe I was just imagining things.

A Holiday Greeting from Subic

2009-12-27T11:04:00.001+08:00

Taken before the Grotto (north-bound) in Subic, while stuck in traffic due
to some unfortunate maneuvering of a heavy equipment used in construction on
Dec. 19, 2009.

I'll take pictures of Castillejos park and plaza before the new year, after
I'm done with my paper.

Happy holidays (again)! Oh, I still have the holiday (vacation) mood despite
the paper (and probably the reason why I can't write the paper). :)

P.S. (off topic) I'm loving Gmail Labs (offline mode). I can now save
attachments even when offline!

Happy Holidays!

2009-12-26T22:33:00.001+08:00

A simple *noche buena*, not a grand display of foods, but a lovely gathering
anyway, especially with cheerful Lara and sleepy Venice. Love love love!
Merry Christmas! :)

A Christmas Wishlist

2009-12-23T20:27:00.001+08:00

Homeworks over the Christmas break really breaks the break.

School-related to do list:

Two short (just three pages each) for economic history
A (probably) long homework for microeconomics (which I haven't really seen yet)

Christmas vacation want to do list:

Write here (which I'm doing anyway). My last real entry was months ago! And since I can't focus on school work, might as well finish this thing.
Write my Christmas wishlist (I haven't done it yet for this year. Read it here somewhere below.)
Read on photography tips. I suck at using flash, and yet I always am in low light situations, and my camera cannot really handle well low light scenes with lots of actions going.
Use the camera on trips! Though this thing would cost me some gas (or food) money.
Sleep, eat and play with the kids (my sisters)!
Read on school-related yet interesting stuff without pressure.

And to continue my yearly list, even if no one really bothers to send me gifts in that list, here it is!

CHRISTMAS WISHLIST:

A compact digital camera, easy to bring anywhere
For the summer season, a waterproof camera and or a waterproofing gear for that big one
Nikon 50mm f/1.8D AF Nikkor Lens (just copied this thing from some website, but that cute little lens, I want that...hihi)

I don't have the money, nor the means to make that money, yet, so those listed above are really just in my dreams. And now for the more realistic ones.

New wardrobe and shoes! And accessories :)
A nice (really nice, let's talk about Oakley) pair of shades
A single bag for the laptop and camera

And the most realistic ones...

Nice set of earphones that fit my ears
Books (I have the list in my FB account, except for the HP series)
More trips!

Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year! :)

Now back to (ir)regular programming... (why have I enrolled in grad school again? oh yeah, I remember...)

P.S. I forgot about the 1 TB external hard disk drive! Or even half of that size. Simply an external HDD. I need it!

Noong Pebrero

2009-12-23T18:50:00.001+08:00

February pala ito. At ngayong taon lang na ito!

Salamat kay Ed para sa larawan.

P.S. ...sinusubukan ko lang ang Flickr-blog upload via e-mail...at trip
lang, hindi recent pic ang ginamit ko... :)

Cute Dog!

2009-12-23T17:50:00.002+08:00

December 13, 2009

On the way to World Trade Center for the bazaar!

Ballpen and yellow paper

2009-09-22T01:31:00.001+08:00

Always with me...

Sapatos

2009-09-21T20:31:00.001+08:00

Kailan kaya makakarating muli ang aking mga sapatos sa ibang bahagi ng Pilipinas?

Fight!

2009-09-14T03:00:00.002+08:00

Kung natalo ng UP ang ADMU sa men's basketball sa round 1,

Kung natalo naman ng NU ang DLSU sa round 2,

Kung nanalo ang ADMU sa cheerdance competition (1st runner up),

Kung sa wakas nag-champion na (muli) ang FEU sa CDC,

Kaya kong mapasa ang Econ 202.

Exam on Friday. I have just started studying. Basic stuff first. Elasticity of demand, super basic! How can I survive this?!

I think I've already lost some 8-10 pounds already since entering graduate school. Ugh! I am so thin! My watch now feels like a bracelet (although it did not really fit me before, anyway).

I'm losing sense already - writing here, at least. Must go back studying. Resist Mafia Wars. Focus. Eat. Sleep. Relax. Enjoy. Pray.

Sa totoo lang, natatakot na ako. Pero, fight pa rin! (a la UP FIGHT!)

A six to nine in the evening exam

2009-09-09T00:23:00.001+08:00

Tomorrow. A very lovely day.

Thankfully, no discussion class in the morning, and problem set submission moved to Thursday.

Then, a 12:00 - 2:00 PM lecture class on macro.

Then, a 3:00-6:00 PM lecture class on micro.

Then, a 6:00-9:00 PM exam on macro.

I haven't really studied enough.

So there, good luck.

The evening exam did not push through. She changed her mind. (edited on 12/27/2009)

Tokyo Cafe

2009-08-22T22:25:00.003+08:00

Tokyo Cafe

SM North EDSA (The Block)

August 6, 2009

Finally! Creamy Shrimp Ebiko Pasta, Gyoza Burger, Vanilla Milkshake, and a coffee with ice cream (some coffee specialty). Love it!

Shei and Kate on a food trip!

First Starbucks Session

2009-08-18T19:26:00.004+08:00

Honey-glazed doughnut and mint tea: Starbucks in Matalino Street

I like that place! One of the few Starbucks shops that I like (what other branch do I like, by the way?). Relaxed ambiance, peaceful, conducive for studying, no unnecessary perkiness, no stress (except for my own studying to do). It feels like a coffee shop, and not a gimmick place. Nice.

I would have wanted to go there again tonight to study (and I'm not even fond of studying in an expensive place because of budget constraints), but it's already late and I won't be getting the best value out of a cup of tea if I went there at this time, and somebody demanding me to go home by 11:30 PM.

Now, an update, musts/deadlines for the week:
- 201hw/231ps discussion (Wed, AM)
- 202 make-up class (Wed, 1-6 PM)
- 201 homework (Thu)
- 231 problem set (Thu)
- 206 group study (Fri, AM)
- 206 problem set (Sat, AM)
- 206 exam (Sat, AM)

What a week!

A Bad Day for Headache

2009-08-15T21:28:00.003+08:00

The road between the main mall and the old SM Cyberzone building, now closed, but with the carpark still operational.

I was there yesterday to buy a chair so I could properly study, not slumped on my bed, which is very conducive for sleeping and net surfing instead.

So now, I should be studying, right?

*** Post title is such because I had a headache yesterday, which did not subside after a single dose of the common paracetamol, so I needed another 500 mg after three hours. That was unusual, as a single table usually works for me. A really bad time for headache, especially with a homework due tomorrow, problem sets due on Thursday and Friday, an exam on Saturday, an exam on the following Wednesday, and a day-long (six hours, actually) lecture this Wednesday (a holiday).

I SHOULD NOW BE STUDYING! Good luck!

Graduate School Updates

2009-08-15T01:22:00.003+08:00

Life: MA life

When I am not in front of my computer, I wanted to write about things on MA and my life. I guess now's not the right time for such "reflections." Just an update. And some insights, perhaps.

Seven weeks to go before finals week. We haven't even had a single midterm examination yet. The first fury of the exam will land on our paths on Saturday, August 22 for our math econ class. Followed by the stat exam on August 26. Then macro and micro, whichever comes first.

I wish to say that I am doing great. I hope I am. Even "okay." I really want to think that way.

Recap: I'm having a difficult time with graduate school

To say that it is not easy is an understatement. It's not just a test of intellectual capacity. It is more of a challenge to learn all "those" things in a short span of time with tons of exercises, problem sets and homeworks to do. "Those" things being lessons that really require a student to not just read articles or books, but to sit down and work out what really they were saying, how and why and whatever else that would matter. Too much for my impatience.

Yet, I find comfort that I still find it exciting. Even if the downside means that I am now somehow accustomed to a staggered pattern of sleeping -- take a "nap" when I get home (after preparing some food or having a snack), then eat dinner when I wake up, then study (or pretend at least), and then sleep again. The good thing from this bad exercise is that it is now becoming a habit to get out of the bed early enough to get to class on time (or maybe just 5 minutes late) and still have time for breakfast.

Graduate school is difficult that I sometimes doubt I'd survive it. Fortunately, we have a professor who gives me hope that I'd survive. It is a compliment that she finds my work "neat." I do not really know what she means by that, but hey, it is a good thing that she likes how I do my work. Even if I am sometimes lost to the intuition behind what I am writing. And, add a bonus that she thinks I could survive learning the dynamic models. I hope so!

But then, that's some pressure to really do good. Honestly, I do not feel I know enough to pass her class. Then, she learned of my grade in her undergraduate class! That was a class during my second year in college, during a time when I was more hardworking, my mind more active, my math fresher, and when a 17-unit load was easy and I still had time for a social life. No, make that social lives between the econ building, math building, manila, and zambales.

Now, I am missing some social life. My MA life is my social life. Yet, still thrilled with it. Great people in my class! I am fortunate to have met them, really. I'm loving my time with them, and some (classroom) chats with professors, too.

I am missing some other things, too. I miss that someone I love (but which the MA program really is of little consequence to that situation). I miss using my camera, even before I have even got to learn how to use it effectively. I miss going out of towns, even on a rainy day. I miss my little sisters, who I think miss me, too, so much. I miss, well, basically those top things.

But I am loving my life, despite all those things. I just have to deal with it. And I still am devoting time for my love and my friends.

I want this. I am going to give my best. Yes. I can. I will. Cheers! :)

Isang gabi ng kabaliwan

2009-07-26T14:33:00.001+08:00

Madaling araw ng Hulyo 26, 2009

Habang pinilipilit mag-aral at na-miss ang camera

* * *

On another note, thank you Lord for making things a bit easier for me.

Thank you for postponing the John Nye lecture tomorrow (which I do not really want to miss). It's bad that he got sick, but I need those extra hours to study. Hope he gets well soon, though.

Thank you that the deadline for the macroeconomics homework has been moved to Friday instead of Wednesday.

Thank you, too, that the stat problem set is manageable, though I still need to learn covariance and correlation.

I want to earn my master's degree in economics.

Thank you.

A post at 2:46 AM about what else...

2009-07-25T02:45:00.003+08:00

...but graduate school.

About what else, but nothing.

I would have wanted to rant, but no, I'll take a positive attitude.

But then...

Really, I am having an extremely difficult time with school.

I seem to have forgotten how to study. I seem to have lost my intellectual capacity to understand what I should understand. I seem to have lost the desire to take my masters.

Why again am I taking M.A. Economics?

Have faith, Kate. Have faith.

And, give your best.

I MISS U

2009-07-20T01:08:00.001+08:00

Graduate School: Never a Dull Moment

2009-07-15T21:11:00.004+08:00

Happy Monthsary!

Yeah, cheezy. Tomorrow's going to be the official first month of my (our batch's) graduate school life. What a life! Never a dull moment, no doubt. Fun.

When I say fun, I'm not kidding. New people, new acquaintances, new friends - a new bunch of people to share smiles and laughter. Young blood to put fresh life to my existence. Mature minds to help me grow. Challenges, not short of it, to push me further. Full of vibrancy, never a dull moment, full of life.

Oh, yeah. Life of a graduate student. Full of activities - problem sets, homeworks, readings, discussion classes, yellow pad destruction. I'm still bad at time management, so I don't how I would survive.

Full of life --- in the end, it would still be my choice whether I would have a life just full of school work, or a life full of the meaningful stuff while gaining new knowledge in graduate school. Never a dull moment in graduate school, full of life in everything. Cheers! Smile and laugh!

And now for our (the) first monthsary, can I request for a box of chocolates, please? :)

Whipped!

2009-07-10T10:33:00.002+08:00

I love the whipped cream in those expensive drinks.

Starbucks 6750 with blockmates
July 3, 2009

...Sometimes I wish to study in those expensive cafes at night so I could concentrate and stay away from distractions. But no, they are expensive beyond my budget. So better be firm and focus on studying. Good luck!

;)

M11 Dinner Meeting

2009-07-09T18:28:00.001+08:00

July 3, 2009
Glorietta 5, Makati City

Bing, Joseph, Gemma, Marcie, Mandy, Kate, Zolah and Yasser, with special appearance by Alelie and Chester

Lessons for the Day

2009-07-08T19:41:00.003+08:00

My Wednesday involves a three-hour class in the afternoon. A boring microeconomics subject, but is, as our professor usually tells us, a necessary thing to learn for "branding" of economists. The lecture is fortunately injected with interesting exchange of thoughts and knowledge about the more vibrant real world issues.

Earlier, Ms. Sarah Daway, probably a legend in recent UPSE history, dropped by the class to share some words of wisdom as requested by our professor, and we were given the chance to ask her questions about some things. She is currently taking her PhD in the US (I forgot the school, just a slight recall of the name but better not mention it since I'm not really sure hehe). Most of the questions from my classmates were about getting in the graduate program of schools abroad, and how economics was taught there. Apparently, despite UPSE being already mathematical (my thought), US economic schools are more mathematical in their approach. Better brush up your math and calculus if you want to go there.

What struck me more was her faith. She said something like this (paraphrased, hope I got it right), "Pray. Sometimes, it is as if things are going against you, but if you believe Him, things will turn out right."

In the "class proper," Prof. Fabella also gave some words of wisdom. He said that, though Ms. Daway would never say this, she is a very hardworking woman. She reads all the suggested readings and more! He further added that some people are simply bright, but what is more important is how hard you work. Nobody should outwork you.

After the class, in a (unintended) chat, he added, regarding graduate schools abroad, that the name of the school does not matter very much anymore. Some people are aiming for the Ivy league schools, but what is more important is your network.

He further added that enrolling in a non-Ivy league school also allows you to be very productive. And as to expanding your network, one way would be to write authors of journal articles or other economists whose work you got interested in. Why not? I remember I did that while writing our undergraduate thesis. The author of the original work where we based our thesis replied to our e-mail, and we responded. However, it was already late when I realized that it remained in my Drafts folder and never got sent. I was not Internet-savvy yet that time, unlike now when I think I am already addicted to the online world.

So what economic concept did I learn today? Oh, some stuff. ;)

The first stack of books

2009-07-06T17:08:00.001+08:00

The first stack of books in the bookshelf in our new place in Quezon City, and my first post of a photo in this blog. :)

I should be studying...

2009-07-06T16:52:00.002+08:00

...but I'm here blogging again. Just to say that I'm merging my other blog with this blog, then make that other blog devoted solely to my trips (lengthy stories of trips). I wish I could do a lot of trips this year, but I'm unemployed and studying, living in poverty for now. I hope something great will happen after graduate school. :)

That's it for now. And a photo post later. Back to reality (homework, food and/or household chores).

Yours truly,
fickle-minded Kate, who could not decide what to do with her blogs

Must study. Must study. Must study.

2009-07-05T10:36:00.003+08:00

I got out of the bed at around 8:30 in the morning. Prepared (re-heated) food for breakfast. Then ate it around 9:30. At around 10:00 AM, I called home. Played Mafia Wars, checked Plurk, and checked Multiply in-between. Now I'm chatting with Mon.

I should have started studying yesterday, but I slept in the afternoon after doing laundry and cleaning some of stuff. Then was so sleepy to even read the problem set last night.

I should have again started studying earlier. But the lure of the online world tempted me, and succeeded in doing so. Now I'm blogging while chatting with Mon.

And I still have a long list of studying to do:

MACRO
- HW 3
- HW 2
- Review/study/read

MICRO
- HW 1
- Study

E206
- Convexity, concavity, etc.

E231
- PS 3, (# 5)

Now, what?

Good luck. ;)

P.S.

I felt like a whiner after reading my post. Oh, I don't want to be a whiner. So what am I going to do?

First, release this excess online world energy to this blog. And I'm now doing it. :)

Then, get my study lamp on. I should get excited about doing that problem set. And other school stuff.

Then, eat. It's almost lunch. I'll be eating the burger, the probably get out of the house to eat more food around snack time. Or cook another corned beef and rice. I'm not the typical Filipino who eats rice every meal time, anyway, for I sometimes eat rice even during snack time. Haha. At least when I'm not at home.

Oh, food. I should also be doing grocery anytime soon. Eating out is so expensive.

Positive energy, come on! =D

Beautiful Scenery

2009-06-28T11:18:00.002+08:00

Green grasses, highlighted by the soft rays of the sun. A touch of brownish green somethings glistening the road. Repetitive light posts lining the island. Rain putting drama in the scenery. Fields looking fresh because of the rain.

Towering orange lights lining up the circular road, giving a sense of "development" in this crazy country. Cut mountains towering between the excellently paved road (this was, of course, not really good in terms of "destroying nature"). Insects battering the windshield as if they were rain, telling me that I am so close to nature even with the engineered road and car (this was also not really good as their population might exponentially dwindle as more cars pass by that road.)

Yet anyway, I enjoyed my drive yesterday, even if I was sleepy most of the time. Alone. Though driving alone was not really new to me. But after a car trouble two weeks ago, the beautiful scenery along NLEX and SCTEX took my mind of the troubles of possibly stalling in expressway.

Top my trip with a halo-halo and palabok from Razon's in Petron Lakeshore. Yum. By the way, the P74 Razon's halo-halo in malls in SM Makati and Trinoma was only P57 in NLEX (Petron Lakeshore or Caltex NLEX San Fernando).

On another note, stopping by Petron Lakeshore gave me a warm feeling. See, this was where Mon and I usually had our stopover when we used to go home together (oh well, he's in Vietnam right now, so I had no choice but to drive alone.)

Later, or tomorrow, I won't be bringing my car to Manila. I'm hoping to catch the bus that will pass through SCTEX. SCTEX scenery in a bus is more fabulous, I think, since I get a more elevated view from the road. Whatever. ;)

What a beautiful day. Hihi.

June 26, 2009

2009-06-26T17:31:00.003+08:00

Where do I start?

I want to say something, but do not know how to say it. Or at least how to present it or start it. Here's the thing: I want to enjoy my life, I want to have a worthwhile life, and I want to share my life with the world. But life is short, so I don't want to waste time and hence I want to start living a life worth living and sharing now.

How do I share my life?

Start small. Here I write again to share my life through writing. I hope that I could write and be able to inspire someone, somewhere, sometime.

Of course, I wish I could do more. I hope I could do more to share my life. I want to teach, and inspire kids (or just kids at heart) to live a wonderful life and to share their lives, too.

But then, "sharing your life" is a concept that's rather vague. It could mean a whole lot of range of different things. Ha, just be happy and share a worthwhile life with others. ;)

What's a life worth living?

No answer. Shouldn't the answer really be on a case-to-case basis? I'm different from you are, anyway, and what's worthwhile for you may not be for me, or vice versa.

As for me, I just want to inspire others, teach, and if I could, work for some economic progress (of some sort).

Now, here I am again saying I hope to write here regularly and share the stuff I'm loving (and not?). But, I've also wanted to take photos to show snippets of my life through my other blog. I wish I could do it this time.

So what am I up to?

Master of Arts in Economics student. Loving it, but I'm not yet sure if the program is loving me. I'm actually surprised with myself. I find myself excited to study, to solve problems, to find out how to work out that problem, to understand basic economic concepts, and to use the library properly (i.e., not for chatting.)

Yet again, I have a problem in discipline and my fitness. Even if I am excited, I still haven't studied properly. It has been just spurts of studying, not really a sustained effort. And I still get tired easily, but my excitement somehow offsets that to enable me to have energy in my classes.

Hmm... so far, I'm loving school. New challenges, renewed brain activity, new acquaintances (and hopefully to be real friends), new chapter. That feels just right. Maybe my enthusiasm with this new "routine" made me embrace my turning 25. I was even more in denial when I turned 24. Now at 25, I am happy and looking forward to a LIFE.

:)

Screwed up priorities; or tired; or simply lazy

2009-05-12T01:39:00.002+08:00

A couple of weeks ago, I started a piece about my "laziness" - I hypothesized that I many not really be lazy after all. It may just be that I get tired easily. Really easily.

I was not able to finish and post that piece for I got sick. And as I was about to go out of the airport that week, I refrained from working so I could get better fast and soon.

But really, I easily get tired. Make me work for a couple of hours straight and I'd feel as if I had worked for eight hours already. Allow me to take breaks in between and I'd abuse it and get distracted. Let me just copy the paragraph I was able to write:

Subject me to two hours straight of work and I'd get tired as if I'm already working for eight hours. Then the next day, I'd feel the hangover of getting tired (I'm not sure what this is, but it's something like I recall how tired I became to the point that my mind already repels the idea of work.) That's how unfit I am.

Then yesterday or today, I thought maybe I just have a screwed up sense of priorities. Work is not a priority (ooh, very bold for me to say it here). I thought school is a priority but I haven't really studied yet to prepare for graduate school. Maybe family is the priority. Far ahead of work. And school.

And maybe I should have had stuck to taking a break. Since a couple of hours work equal eight hours in my perception, maybe a couple of years working is like eight years of working already.

Or am I just justifying my laziness? I hate being lazy. But this has been my laziest state so far. My most irresponsible me. I may have done something irresponsible big time before, but I could say it was also a factor of ignorance or innocence or stubbornness. This time, I could say irresponsible a factor simply of stubbornness.

Oh, help me. Crazy me. Now, I'm stressed out again.

Updates, Un-Progress and Progress

2009-04-14T16:14:00.000+08:00

It has almost been smooth sailing a while back, but then boom, insanity broke loose.

I don't know when it really started. I guess that was around the MA Econ qualifying exam period.

The Devastatingly Difficult Exam

Around the week of that momentous exam, I had a lot of backlog in work. I needed to work as if it was not a part time work. Then the exam period came. I had to at least review and prepare for it. But then I was overwhelmed with the tons of knowledge I almost forgot. Friday was another unproductive day.

March 28. The exam day. S***! That was so difficult. I could remember murmuring bad words to my dear friend who said it was an easy exam that needs no preparation. My essay was poor. Math was the easiest subject, which I wasn't even able to finish. It was a miracle if I even got 50% in the economics section. That was just simply one of the most horrible exams I've had (aside probably the 17% or so Math 17 exam I got in my freshman year.)

Disappointment. Confusion. Near depression.

I was almost set to taking my masters in economics this June, and make a thesis on property rights or even tourism as a development strategy for Zambales. Afterward, I imagine myself applying for a teaching position in Ramon Magsaysay Technological University or a university just outside Zambales (near a beach or some nature tripping destination.) I was not so keen on research, but I guess I had to deal with it.

With the kind of exam I had, my mind started drifting to other things.

Research? Or Adventure?

Though my interview went well, and I was hoping that my referees (and mentors) gave me a good recommendation, I was still haunted by the idea of not qualifying for the MA. It would be a disappointment for me, and that would be an embarrassing reality since I graduated from that school with honors. So I thought of an alternative plan, or at least an idea of an alternative plan, which later made me not feel bad about failing and may even feel good about it.

My desire to go to an adventure re-surfaced.

During my stay in my previous work, when the project was ending, and with life and career talks with my boss, I resolved that I wanted to do an adventure before taking my masters this June. Maybe volunteer, do some work in another province, teach, explore other culture. It was exciting.

However, that was easy to say and difficult to execute. Then I got a call to do assistant research work, which I accepted. One project, then it became two.

The research work was not the primary reason why I did not pursue that adventure route. It was only secondary. I was prevented from doing it mainly because (1) I did not know where to go; (2) I did not know how to do it; and (3) I did not even know exactly what I want to do. Then there was a third reason - somebody's against this idea of going solo to another place. Ho-hum.

With the then overwhelming feeling of not going to pass for the MA Econ program, I started planning (or just thinking) about my adventure trip. I even included going abroad as an option. Go abroad and earn tons of money. Go somewhere else and apply for a really different job. Go to a culturally rich society and indulge myself in their rich traditions. Or simply teach. Start fresh. For not making it to the program would really be devastating, even if I say I'd feel good about pursuing an adventure plan.

Besides, I did not think I was even good in research. I may even suck at research. Honestly, it's not my comfort zone. After my undergraduate thesis, research was not a good thing to me anymore.

I was even thinking about quitting.

Incoming Call from 029205460

I thought it was Devie from the La Salle Institute of Governance. I've got a potential part time work with the Institute again, not really an academic research, which I like. However, with the turmoil going in my head, I was not ready to accept a third project. How could I handle three projects when I can't even manage to do my job with only two? I was anxious (was that the right word?)

Then I recognized it was not Devie. Oh, could that be Ms. Chilly (of the graduate program in UPSE)? Yes it was.

She was asking if I'd take the economics refresher course that starts this Saturday, and if I got the letter already. I did not get the letter, but I'd take the refresher. Apparently (or maybe?), I passed. (They wouldn't call me about the course if I did not pass, right? Still doubting that I am qualified.)

Is Economics for Me?

Even with that call, I don't think that question's been cleared yet. I have no interest in the money market, the stock market, the investment climate, the economic crisis, the financial market, the fiscal sector, and anything related to the economics of money, banking and financial markets. I still get lost with economic theories. I just know that I want to do my share to help my country progress from being a developing or a third-world or an underdeveloped country, and spill the benefits to my fellow Filipinos. I just know that I want to help boost tourism without abusing the environment (sustainable development, do we all understand that?). And, I still want to learn how to tie property rights (or secure property rights) with economic development.

Goodness, I've been with the property rights project for almost two years already and I still don't understand the economic aspect of that property rights thing. I understand the governance side, but I need some economic understanding of that thing! Wish me luck.

Maybe I am Simply Lazy

A good friend told me that I am capable to do what I want to do since I'm, well, good (?) and even above-average (?). Haha, maybe I'm also lacking in confidence that I don't consider myself above-average. Or maybe I'm just lazy that I don't get to see and realize my potential.

Or crazy

I want a good life, but I don't want to work. My equally crazy boyfriend supports me in my idea to not work... eventually.

Or Lacks Motivation

I have almost always wanted to teach. Maybe that's the key to my "work happiness". Since senior year, I hated research. Maybe that's why I'm not good at research.

I Need a Masters Degree

Then it all leads to taking my masters degree. I need an MA to enable me to teach. That's like the minimum requirement for almost every university or even a college.

So now, wish me luck.

For the meantime, I have work to do. It's actually an easy work, but I lack the motivation.... (here I go again...)

Now I think I should just say, force me to work and live a life!

Thank you all for reading this piece. ;)

What I Want to Do (Honestly)

2009-03-19T17:57:00.000+08:00

I know what I want to do for now.

I want to move out of Makati, go to some province (not a far-flung province, just outside Zambales and Metro Manila), and try to live there, not for a vacation, but live there.

I want to teach. I want to teach in that province.

I want to explore other work, career or profession. In that province, I also want to try other jobs, as a tour guide maybe?

But how? How about my work right now? I’ve been on it for just a few months.

How about grad school? I’ll take the qualifying exams next weekend. And in most cases, I need my master’s degree to be able to teach in college.

Now, what? What do I do now?

Lost Again: Thinking Too Much

2009-03-19T15:33:00.003+08:00

What should I be doing? What do I really want to do? What do I really want?

I'm (semi) deep in thought again as to what I want to do, what I should be doing, and if I'm doing the right thing. Too much thinking.

Sometimes I wish I'm just the typical person who's contented (or appear to be contented) with going to an office, working as an employee, and helping that company grow tons of income. (Un)Fortunately, I'm not.

Then, add the questions of how to live my life. How do I balance my crazy wants with the practical and mundane things in my world? How do I ensure that I have the resources to live my life? Then again, how do I want to live my life? Really?

Oh, I'm lost again. Help me. Please.

Improving!

2009-03-17T20:28:00.003+08:00

My progress is as little as it may seem, but I am still proud to say that I am improving based on the following grounds, which are all related to working (and yes, I'm working.)

I start at the time I tell myself to start working. Once I start working, then on to it! I even get tired working (which then makes me stop working haha.)
I'm done with the vacation/bum mode that has been crippling me the past weeks (or months.) I just feel it.
I walk around the block especially when I get tired or hungry.

So how does it fare to the four things that stood out for me to "cure my laziness" (something I've blogged about a month ago)?

(neg) I still do not sleep early and still do not get up early
(neg) I really don't have a purpose and motivation that's enough for me to make me get up early
(good) I don't think I need to keep reminding myself "to give it at most five minutes" to start a task anymore (surprisingly, I just do what has to be done, and I hope I don't jinx it by blogging about it)
(good) I walk around the block to compensate for my physical inactivity while in front of the computer (walking, no matter what kind of walking, is a form of exercise, right?)

[Legend: red is bad; green is good; yellow is somehow good but needs improvement]

What then are my next steps?

I have set my alarm once again to remind me to sleep (set it at 11:00 PM for now)
On the "purpose and motivation," it is a difficult one - I guess it is a continuing process to learn more about it and about myself, and and confusing, too
Keep up the positive vibe and work attitude
Try walking around the block early in the morning

Good luck! That's it for now. Tons of work to do (uhm, maybe not tons, but simply something significant that I cannot and should not neglect and screw up.)

:)

Making the Most Out of My Life (Trying)

2009-03-11T18:48:00.000+08:00

...I'm trying really hard to be productive and make the most out of every minute of my life...

I know that I shouldn't live like a bum. I know that I should be up early in the morning to start my day fresh and refreshed. I know that I should go to bed early to get the right quality of sleep. I know that I should do my best in work. I know that I should do some exercise. I know that I should eat right at the right time. I know that I should live.

Yet, I'm a mess. Or maybe just out of place, out of sync, out of balance, out of (in)sanity.

I'm living like a bum. I get up late. I go to bed late. I am unproductive (by my standard.) I do not exercise. I do not eat right. Hence, it feels like wasting precious moments of my life.

Sometimes I think that I got a part-time research work at the wrong time. Or sometimes I think I'm not fit for it. Or sometimes I think it was simply a wrong move.

Yet, I don't blame my work for my unproductive boring life. I know that even if I don't have a work, I would still be the same - unproductive and boring. That work is actually a hands-on discipline test for me. Not a "research" learning activity, but a lesson on discipline.

I should really be living every minute of my life. I said I'd start then to live. Yet here I am ranting again. So again, I will (try) to make the most out of every minute of my life and live.

Oh, help me!

A Few Lessons in Mt. Pulag

2009-02-26T09:00:00.005+08:00

Climbing my first mountain did not just cross out one of the things I want to do in my life (or places to go to), but brought me some lessons I should value. Of course those "lessons" came upon further reflection or reminiscing of what happened.

February 21-22, 2009, through the "Climb a Mountain, Build a House" fund-raising for the JGC-Philippines - Gawad Kalinga Community Project, I did it. My first climb. Mt. Pulag in Benguet, via the Ambangeg Trail.

I have wanted to experience climbing a mountain and reach the summit because I want to show myself that I can do it. I am not a healthy and fit person with an active lifestyle - I usually just sit around in front of a computer almost all day, and walking is the most physical activity I get (with an umbrella - my pseudo-trekking pole - to assist me in stairs or in times of laziness.) I even have neurofibroma of the pelvis, but that only motivates me and does not stop me from climbing (I have my doctor's verbal permission, anyway.)

This climb is somehow special because, for one, it is MT. PULAG, and secondly, to add some spice to it, the climb is for a cause.

In an outdoor shop in Farmers in Cubao, while I was waiting for my friends purchase some camping equipment, I got to chat with one of the persons there, a climber, and got to tell him about our trip. He was surprised that it was my first climb, a major climb. Oh yes, I read somewhere that mountaineers consider it a major climb despite the easy trail. By the way, he added na sana hindi ako madala sa akyat na ito (na naramdaman ko, at muntik na ngang nangyari).

Easy trail: true. Even young and old people can climb Mt. Pulag: true. There is an established trail, and it is not steep. Yet, these cannot be true for a person without preparation. That's my first lesson. While it seemed easy, I shouldn't have taken it so lightly, especially since it is a new endeavor for me. That's my second lesson.

For everything, not just a climb, preparation is the key.

For new adventures, not just this one, and especially for life-changing decisions, forethought should be given.

As I didn't prepare, and I took the climb lightly, I had these infamous incidents: really slowing down everyone behind me because of my super slow pace on descending the mountain; removing the soles of my rubber shoes (damaged shoes); achy muscles at the back of my right knee that made going up or down an inclined plane really difficult; crappy breakfast; and a battery-drained camera in the summit. I survived those!

On climbing, here are the lessons I learned:

Wear a good pair of shoes. The team leader, Jake, said that running shoes shouldn't have been a problem to use in trekking Mt. Pulag. My running shoes, however, did not survive the trek. I guess my pair was not properly conditioned like its owner.
Trekking poles are a huge help, I guess. I use my big umbrella as a pseudo-trekking pole in the city, so I'm inferring that I need a trekking pole in a mountain.
When three people try to sleep in a single-man tent, with two sleeping mats, a sleeping pad, a couple of jackets, a couple of jogging pants, gloves, socks and bonnet, it can get hot even in Mt. Pulag. I experienced that, which made me remove my socks, gloves, a jacket, bonnet, and almost made me remove one of my jogging pants, if not for the limited space.
Offering eggs seems to work. I heard one of the participants offered eggs for good weather. And we got it! :)

Pictures here. Cheers!

Professional Help?

2009-02-15T20:34:00.002+08:00

I now think I might need a professional help. I am so lazy, I get nothing done, I am simply lazy and so unproductive.

I hate being like this. I want to be productive. I want to have a meaningful life. I want to LIVE.

However, I am just so lazy. I can't get myself to move. It feels like I lack motivation. Oh, I'm lost.

Retreat to charge?

Laziness

2009-02-11T16:03:00.002+08:00

7:00 AM. 8:00 AM. 10:00 AM. 1:00 PM. Finally I got up at 1:00 PM.

That's how lazy I am. I always have my alarm set at 8:00 AM, but I almost always end up getting up between 9:00 and 10:00 in the morning. Today, it is a bit different. I got out of the bed in the afternoon.

Last week I recognized this as a problem. I stay in bed until almost lunchtime, stay inactive for the rest of the day just surfing the Internet, get distracted, play escape games (which I seldom solve by myself), prepare food, eat, remain hungry if laziness is at its peak, stay up late, sleep, get up late. Boring, pathetic routine.

Desperate, I searched Google how to wake up early. The following day, I searched how to prevent laziness. There are actually numerous articles about the topics, amazingly or not. Some offer advices that made me think, "oo nga naman." Practical. Plain common sense is all that's required to understand them.

What stood out for me:

Sleep early to wake up early, and get enough rest and sleep for energy the following day
Have a purpose and motivation to get up early
Give it five minutes to start a task (I didn't fully understand this one, but since it is starting a task that's so difficult, I should give myself that amount of time to kick off something)
Exercise (I'm not sure if this one's included in all those lists, but I think exercise releases feel good hormones and that would keep me energized)

So far, I haven't done a thing in that four-bullet list. Oh, I tried to make work as my motivation, but it's no use. I tried "to walk around the park very early in the morning and feel the cool breeze" as another motivation, but the feeling that my body needs more sleep always wins. Why bother myself to get up early?

Well, I want to live a life. I'm missing a lot by sleeping in most of the morning, then trying to get myself moving most of the afternoon, then trying to work most of the evening. It's tiring, boring and pathetic.

I'm writing all about this hoping that it would give me fresh perspective that I'm missing a lot with my lazy routine. Get a life, Kate!

6:00 PM. After two hours, I'm finally posting this article. Escape games got in the way. Ha! I forgot my resolution to keep it one game a day only, but I didn't play a cutie game, anyway.

Again, 6:00 PM. Get a life, Kate!

Escape Games

2009-02-05T12:40:00.003+08:00

I am an escape game addict, even if most of the time I couldn't get out of the room without the cheats.

I haven't even eaten anything yet, but solved two games already. Here's where I go. I'm trying to break that habit.

Not in the mood for escape games? Here are some cutie games I just discovered yesterday.

How am I going to live a great life when I am glued to my computer playing games and barely working? I need a life! I have to move on. A single game a day won't hurt, will it?

So here's another resolution for my life: a single escape game a day only, plus one cutie game probably.

Please allow me to play one game of Pocketful of Stars before I start a productive day. I haven't met my quota yet for the cutie game, anyway. ;)

Feeling Better

2009-02-03T13:14:00.002+08:00

I'm feeling better now. I'm actually feeling good! :)

After feeling somehow lonely or sad (nalulumbay) yesterday, and after allowing myself to express myself out, I'm now starting anew with a fresh resolve to make my life great.

I got up at 9:30 this morning, not as early as I wished it, but what the heck, I was (almost) sleep-deprived the night before (having got up at four in the morning), and almost starving myself for not eating a real lunch yesterday so it suits me just fine. Besides, I have so far very minimal idle time.

I cooked lunch, I "clarified" my mind by posting in this blog, and after this, I am set to work a real work. I'll catch up on the days I slacked in my tasks.

So now I feel better. Mon's in Vietnam familiarizing his new work (in what he called a "superstructure" and I am in another new start (please relate to my two previous posts.)

;)

Ten Years From Now

2009-02-02T19:35:00.000+08:00

Seven months ago, I could not answer the question how I wanted to live my life ten years from now. I could only utter, "I do not know," and just had a vague idea that I didn't want to be working. Back then, I did not have the confidence to face myself and show "me" to others.

now I answer that question. Ten years from now, i want to:

have a happy family, a family I'll take care of and love
be attending full time to my children
have a stable source of decent income
teach; and
probably still pushing/advocating a noble cause

Some, in their ordinary meanings, may be in conflict with the other. Let me just say then that "full time" is a relative term.

Here I illustrate:

I need my MA to enable me to teach.

I need to establish my expertise (most likely property rights) to continually push for the noble cause (hey, I need to grow) by doing research/paper.

It would help to have my specialization to allow me to teach with depth.

Then again, MA would really strengthen me in that area.

From teaching, I can earn some income for my family.

But really, I do hope to get some good investment from which I can support my family without requiring me to work nine to five.

So how do I invest? Where do I get my capital? How do I earn that?

On MA, how or where can I get the money I need to finish it (tuition, books, allowance, miscellaneous)?

On research, do I need funding? Where? How? What?

That's my simplified "plan," but with a number of questions unanswered, the answers of which affects me NOW. At least I already have an answer on that ten-year question.

Good luck!

Blank

2009-02-02T19:06:00.002+08:00

Birthday ni Shei

Happy 24th Birthday! :)

Pumunta sa Vietnam si Mon :(

Lav u!

Muni-muni

Blank

It feels like I have been thinking about a lot of things today - with the way I act, walk, see people, write, etc., I look totally absorbed and feel tired - but my mind's just been a blank.

I try to reflect, but my mind ends up wandering to nowhere and about notheing. I do not want to think. I haven't even remembered today is Shei's birthday (even if I already associated Mon's departure date with Shei's day), until I checked Friendster.

But oh! End that gloomy feeling! While my dear rommate is started her 24th year today, and my dear honey's in Vietnam for a new career, I now resolve to have a fresh start in my life. Oh yeah, lots of new and fresh this time - new year last January 1 to welcome 2009, new year last January 26 to welcome the year of the Ox, and February 2, new year for a fresh start (again!).

No holding back now. As I took an adventure for openly embracing being unemployed when our project ended last December, I am now going to start (finally) the journey. I just do not know where and how.

I had some inititatives already, anyway. Submission of my application to the UPSE graduate program two weeks ago and accepting a part time work as a research assistant in a new field/project (oooh).

I start now.

First task(s): clarify my mind and "fortify" my dreams.

# # #

P.S.

I thought I wouldn't cry, but I did. It's not that I'm SAD. I'm happy for him. I think it's a good career choice to go there. It's just that I'm missing him.

Tulad nga ng napag-usapan namin ng kaibigan ko kanina, hindi dapat "malungkot." Nalulumbay, ganun siguro.

Just Sad

2009-01-28T20:05:00.003+08:00

I know I wouldn't be sad if I'd be the one to leave the country for a work (or an adventure or an opportunity or school) abroad.

On Sunday, Mon is set to fly to Vietnam. A new work in a new place. I should be happy, but I am sad. Well, I'm also happy for him.

He got a call last week telling him that he'd be going first week of February. Two weeks of notice. He accepted this job last December, but there was not definite date yet then. So it still feels like a rush. In a few days, I won't be able to call him via Globe's P20 for 20 minutes anymore. In a few days, we'd be relying more on Internet chats. And I won't be able to hug him as easily.

Hay, just sad. I'm wondering how it would be like. (It's not easy pala to write this down... to write how I feel about him working so far away from me.)

At least one thing's making me feel good: Vietnam is very near this beloved country and definitely easier to go to than if he went to Middle East. I should now be saving for my second foreign trip hehe (but I don't have a job. bah.)

Four Super Short Stories: A Written Snapshot of a Lot Going On

2009-01-27T01:17:00.001+08:00

My body is telling me to sleep. It's already past one in the morning! But my mind's keeping me wide awake. I can't even think clearly about the various things that's running in my mind.

Item # 1: Mon will be leaving for Vietnam on Sunday for work - a year away from me, from each other

He was informed about it on January 19. Oh, they said he would be leaving on the third of February, but informed him a week later that he might be leaving earlier instead. Ah! It's going to be a really new year with new adventure - no Mon by my side. Thanks to the internet, and thankfully it's only Vietnam, I hope it wouldn't feel like so far away from each other.

Item # 2: I applied for the graduate program in UPSE

Last week, I finally submitted my application for the MA program in Econ. Finally! After a "long preparation." I asked three of my mentors to recommend me to the program, which took me about three days to complete excluding following them up about submitting the form. I wrote my statement of purpose for desiring to study economics, which took me (let me guess) about a week in all to finish excluding idle time in between "actively writing days" (please not that I count a couple of hours work in a day as one single day). I hope I can make it!

Item # 3: I have a part time work as a research assistant for an ICT project

Cyber campaign. Political blogging. 2010 presidential election. That's what the project is about. I wouldn't miss the Senate after all! Hehe. I'm thankful that I have this work. However, with the two items above occupying my mind the past week (and still this week for item # 1), I haven't really given much time for this worthwhile research work. I'll catch up tomorrow. I already started earlier tonight. Yipee! Though I didn't expect it is tiring just surfing the internet about presidentiables' websites, blogs, social networking sites, latest polls, etc. And I don't even know what exactly I should do aside from document those things. Which reminds me that it is necessary to have regular internet access.

Item # 4: If I couldn't find additional sources of income, I would have to ask for money from my Daddy starting September - or even June if I should be more practical

I have to admit it. Oh, life. I have to work. Haha! Though I'm actually thinking of using the "business" side of what I learned in college. I took a major in business economics, by the way. ;)

Happy Chinese New Year! (Whew, new year uli haha!)

a lot

2009-01-21T12:49:00.002+08:00

For the past week, a lot has happened. Too much for my disorganized life. I have to keep things in order now. I'll write about it next time. Good luck! :)

Stress, Work

2009-01-13T11:58:00.000+08:00

Thinking about work stresses me out. I don't even have a work to think about!

My focus right now is to finally write my statement of purpose for applying for the graduate program in UPSE. However, as my mind cannot keep still and random thoughts continuously bug me, the idea of work sure does come around. I think about what I should do, what I should work on, what I would do if I should work again, what it would feel to work again, what I would experience if I work on a project, what it entails if I work while I study, etc., etc.

Now what? I need to de-stress. Inhale... Exhale... (With eyes closed.) Inhale... Exhale... (Repeat.)

Clear. Now it's lunch time. I should be stressed about now having my essay yet! I'll work on it now. Or later after lunch. Ta da!

An After Shock of "The Alchemist"

2009-01-12T17:23:00.002+08:00

"When you want something, all the universe conspires to help you achieve it." - The Alchemist, Paolo Coehlo

What do I really want? Am I ask myselft that question again?

Am I losing sight of what I want in my life, what I want to do and what I want to achieve? Uh, no, I don't think so, for I am still on the part stage of self-discovery (so I want to think.)

Before my contract ended last December, I knew what I wanted to do. I was to take my masters this June, have a little vacation, volunteer perhaps, and eventually teach. I was not and still am not sure if I really wanted to teach college, for I have a soft spot for high school students, but a masters degree in economics, I believe, would be beneficial. (Oh how generic.)

Somehow, in my little vacation here at home, I got distracted. Two reasons for the nuisance: (1) I still think of the practical side of my decision - where do I get money for surviving the city and save for the future; and (2) I find myself in a dreary routine of a lazy life without the superficial worries.

For the first distraction: the practical side or the worldly matters

I took the courage to embark on this journey without a secure job. I am still not looking for a new one. I still have savings enough for six months if I stick to my strict budget (cut that to three months if I am get back to my previous spending habit.)

After that, however, I ask myself, "what?" What do I do?

"When you want something, all the universe conspires to help you achieve it."

Maybe indeed I am losing sight of what I want.

Previously, I thought of this unsecured position to try out sourcing some income from a sideline, a racket or a little kiddie (start-up, try-out) business. In other words, try to be an entreprenuer (if I am worthy to be called that.)

I have always wanted to have my own business to handle. However, I was hesitant to start - I was afraid, I felt I needed somebody else with me to push me to start, also felt that I did not have enough capital to do so. They can all be overcome easily, I say. Except for the "afraid part." Ha! Now I'm still wary to do something with this desire.

For the second distraction: I am a bum

This is the more serious one.

I knew that one or two weeks (after the holidays) of being bum is enough. I am right. Now on the second week, I am being used to the carefree days of being here - not needing to worry about food, about cleaning the house and about other chores. I am now lazy to do a thing (except check my e-mail and other Internet accounts and read.)

Like being in an office, the familiarity of my surroundings hinders me from being creative. I cannot think and I cannot do things I wanted to do (like write my statement of purpose for applying for the graduate program in UPSE.)

The Alchemist

As if an "omen" to pursue what I have to do, I bought "The Alchemist," which is a "fable about following your dream." I finished the book earlier. Inspired, I am now writing here, as if to clear my thoughts on what to do next, or to hear what my heart is saying.

I cannot clearly say what my heart is saying at this moment, but at least I am rejuvinated once again to live. I don't want to be a bum anymore. I equate it to throwing away a chance to live and enjoy my life. Now that's my resolution. Oh help me!

What do I really want?

For now they are:

MA: Take my masters, finish it and of course learn from it! Oh, first I need to complete and send my application.
Teach: while I may need a masters degree to do that, maybe a little experience would do good?
Volunteer: I don't know how to proceed with this; I just believe it will help me grow
Raket: At least one step!
Travel: My favorite ;)

Cheers!

A Few Stories

2009-01-10T18:41:00.002+08:00

The Tequila Shots

Last night, I had at most ten shots of tequila. It was Auntie Precy's birthday, and with my aunts drunk some drink to celebrate (after a delicious dinner.) Oh life!

The Jueteng in Castillejos

During last night's gathering, I learned that jueteng, or whatever it is called, is legal in this little town. The municipality benefits from the proceeds of that controversial game.

Twenty Years After

I spent the whole day yesterday reading Twenty Years After. I finally finished it! :) Now I'm reading The Alchemist, in a slower pace than Dumas' adventure novel.

Project: De-clutter Room

From 2:00 in the afternoon to about 4:30, I cleaned a small part of my room. Ha! A couple more areas to de-clutter.

Statement of Purpose

I intended to start writing my statement of purpose last Thursday. Two days after, I still haven't written even the first sentence. Good luck!

What's next? Live a life! ;)

A Chronicle of the Trip to Olongapo City

2009-01-08T13:34:00.000+08:00

Wednesday, January 7, 2008

As I was driving on our way to Olongapo (with little sisters and two adults), I got a text from a boss in my previous work asking me if he could call to discuss some short term assignment. I replied I was driving, so if he could please call after 30 minutes. I didn't get a call. I still haven't got the guts and clarity of mind to call or text him about it.

I first went to a bank to withdraw the money I budgeted to spend for the month of January, then deposited the reservation fee for the Mt. Pulag climb to my friend's account who advanced my payment to another account in another bank that doesn't have a branch anywhere near here.

Afterward, we went to National Bookstore to buy some supplies I thought I would be needing in this adventure. I spent close to PhP500 inclusive of the book, "The Alchemist." Oh I recall, I spent another PhP500 earlier for the gas.

We dropped by Reyes Haircutters where my tita bought something, then proceeded home.

In Subic, we stopped by the newly-opened Chowking to buy food for me and my little sisters. Another PhP262 (or was that PhP272?) spent.

As we waited for the order in the pseudo-fastfood, pseudo-Chinese restaurant, I searched for a 300 Globe prepaid card that I badly needed. No prepaid cards in the first two stores I went. Thinking that a Globe prepaid card is scarce in that area, I walked a few more meters away from the resto to buy that good in 7-11 (also new in the area.) Alas! They did not have a card worth PhP300. So I settled for the 500 load.

Just yesterday, I spent close to PhP1800 for various items, plus another PhP1500 for my February escapade. It made me think that I did not budget enough for the month. Time to get kuripot again!

The LBC Story

2009-01-08T13:11:00.003+08:00

I have narrated just this morning how I went to Subic to have an important package sent to my roommate immediately.

I troubled myself to get to the next town thinking it's where I could find the nearest LBC branch.

Oh, I didn't know, we have an LBC branch right here in Castillejos.

I have a lot to learn about my hometown! What's next, a Jollibee? ;)

(Still did not find LBC in Casti. I think Daddy was wrong in that respect. Hehe. --Kate, 12/28/09)

The Keys

2009-01-08T10:09:00.002+08:00

Who would have thought that my dearest roommate will be part of my adventures?

Of course, being my roommate, she's going to be a definite part of my journey. But a direct participant, if not the cause, of my rush this morning? Hehe.

A little past 8:00 in the morning, my phone rang. Awakened from my slumber, I saw it was Shei calling and felt the urgency to answer it. Oh, she locked her keys inside the bathroom. Our landlord could not be reached, there was no way for her to retrieve those precious keys, except perhaps to destroy the bathroom door.

Slowly, I opened the computer to check for the contact information of courier services and called to ask if they had same day delivery services. LBC, JRS, FEDEX, 2GO. None. All of them offer next day delivery services. As for AIR21, I didn't find information, or maybe there was none, of a branch near our home.

Around 9:15 in the morning, I went out to send the keys in LBC Subic branch. I went out without taking a bath, which is something I very rarely do. It costed PhP135.00 for that set of keys. And a level one difficulty of going back the road in that congested area of the town. Whew!

Shei should be able to receive that tiny package tomorrow before lunch in LBC Burgos branch. Haha, her adventures of forgotten keys, though superiorly less than mine, are surely more exciting than my own. ;)

Bum

2009-01-07T10:03:00.002+08:00

I'm still living a bum life.

I initially planned to wake up early today, but heck, I still have runny nose so I thought I deserved to sleep late. Besides, it was so good to sleep with my little sister beside me, cuddling me. Hehe.

So I woke up at 9:30 AM since I had to eat breakfast and drink the medicine my father bought for me and which I did not really want to take. Two capsules left, then tomorrow I won't be taking them anymore. Haha.

Yesterday, I slept the whole afternoon (almost), then surfed the internet afterward. I got up late, so it left me with basically nothing sensible to do in the morning. A bum life, won't you agree?

Yet I say that a week or two of being a bum, of doing almost nothing (emphasis on almost) is enough. More than that would be too much and unhealthy. This afternoon, I will go to Olongapo to buy things I need and to help me jump start my adventure (hey, I need money.) Tomorrow I plan to wake up early and enjoy the cool air of the morning. Then enjoy.

Cheers to a beautiful day!

A New Year, Definitely a New Start

2009-01-06T17:00:00.002+08:00

January 4, 2008

That's the date when Mon went to Manila leaving me behind here in our dear hometown, Castillejos.

Around 1:30 in the afternoon

That's the time when it hit me that this is going to be a definitely new year, a new life, a new start.

Ah! All the drama!

Last December 2008, the project I am working on ended. No funding was secured before I my contract ended, so now I am without a job. Yet still, even if we were able to secure funding before the year ended, it is most likely that I would choose to embark on a completely crazy journey to discover myself and my potentials.

Prodded by my boss, or more appropriately inspired by my boss, I decided to leave a secure lifestyle and just go with whatever flow (I do not know.) Now I do not have a job, am inclined to do volunteer work, take my masters in June, and eventually teach (which according to my mentor is just like doing volunteer work due to the very low pay.)

I am excited to take this adventure. I plan to take many trips, many endeavors, many must do's, and re-invent, or rather, improve myself. Yet, the only problem I will be facing would be funds - I only have six months worth of savings to spend stingily. Haha! Oh, I do not want to worry about that now.

Now it's the start. Cheers to the new year!